Our brains were beaten to a pulp to learn each minute, relevant and irrelevant detail so that we could somehow catalogue those tidbits into a useful, accessible database. But still, every resident still has feelings that the day to day coping mechanisms cannot compensate for. You can totally make our day with a Chipotle burrito or a morning donut/ coffee.As a consequence, if you say something remotely fascinating, please don’t be offended by our follow-up interrogating. For me, when I hit rock rock bottom, I just need to spend lots ofalone time with my dog on my bed. Non- hospital food and coffee is ALWAYS superior to hospital food and coffee. When we sip that Starbucks coffee cup at work, it is a pleasant reminder to us that we are still somewhat normal human beings in touch with the outside world.Most nurses have seen the Grey’s Anatomy episode where Rose, the nurse, and Derek, the dreamy surgeon, take their relationship to the next level. Nurses rarely sneak off to on-call rooms in the middle of a shift.In fact, hospital call rooms have very small, squeaky beds and very thin walls!Doctors used to marry nurses -- it was a more common practice in previous generations. Here’s a list of reasons why you may not want to either.Kathleen Colduvell RN, BSN, BA, CBC graduated with a degree in English and journalism before going back to nursing school.
They have worked incredibly hard to get where they are (and I’m sure you have too), but unfortunately, their schedules (especially 3 year and residency) do not flex for anyone else in their life. You may have been told or feel otherwise, but that is a lie.So just ask yours if you should page / text / call them. Most of the sleep we accumulated in medical school was drunken hangover sleep and dreaming of test material, and most of the sleep we experience now is with a dysfunctional circadian rhythm. We love to believe you, but if what you says seems fishy, we will inadvertently turn to objective data to corroborate your story. Believe me, you don’t want to be lumped in with the pain-med seeker who has 10/10 headaches and can still sleep soundly in the ED, yell at the triage nurses, and eat a full meal while sitting under bright fluorescent lights. We are not medication or medical imaging vending machines. Feel free to refer your family/friends to us for an informal conversation re: their low back pain or new rash.So please do not wake us up early on days we can sleep in. Let us know if you have been in an ER waiting room for hours. The things we hear, the diseases we see, the people we touch, the emotional burden we bear, the hours we work, and the medical responsibility we have—those are things you will never experience.Most of us only get sick during residency because we do not sleep enough. Most of us resident physicians have been learners for 20 years, heck, some of us even have Ph Ds and Masters degrees. We want to help you, but generally, we cannot give you stuff other than medical advice that is better than Web MD. In addition, it is unethical for us to prescribe your mother’s Xanax and impossible for us to give you a free MRI. So please don’t say you understand how difficult my job is or how my patient feels.An early am morning walk on the beach to see the sunrise is akin to a non-urgent page at am— tolerable, but annoying.3. We have evolved to learn, memorize, analyze, and think critically extremely quickly. In addition, we as physicians are taught to never treat who we're dating and to never date who we're treating. The painful, ugly, humiliating, and private things that make you gasp on TV, we’ve probably seen ten of them in living color and had to touch them.Find out your MD/ DO's means of escape from the hospital and make sure you R-E-S-P-E-C-T it. We would love some—homecooked, deli, leftovers from a restaurant. Life becomes very lame when all of your fluid intake/output is at the hospital.